Saturday, April 24, 2010

My Little Pony


I was just reading a book which talked about a private detective of sorts, who searches for antiques, vintage clothes, toys that were adored in childhood, etc. It made me wonder what i would want if i ever get a chance. The first thing that popped into my head was my first My Little Pony pony. It was a gift from my aunt, a beautiful tiny purple plastic pony, with a mane and tail of glossy purple hair and flowers on its body. I googled and found a picture of the exact same pony. I dont know what happened to the one i had. I searched everywhere but couldn't find it. After some months i forgot about it. Then one day, years later, i found out that my best friend then (a boy) had a similar pony which was blonde with clover leaves on its body. If i couldn't have my old pony, i really wanted that one. By then, that particular model was no longer manufactured. So, i traded a "BLUE" teddy bear i had for the clover pony. I still have it. Its but a shadow of my beautiful purple one, but something is better than nothing, isn't it? I love the blonde pony too, don't get me wrong, but the one i had before was something else.
Nostalgic much? :P

Friday, September 18, 2009

Double Trouble

What's the harm in being a little "non-veg", I ask you?
In my humble opinion(IMHOWTF), having an over-thinking brain adds that little flavor to an otherwise boring existence. Tell me, how many of you who have watched Kaminey haven't asked yourself the same question (What would Charlie say if he wanted to say the word "suck"?) and giggled uncontrollably like little school girls? If you haven't, i seriously pity you and your "non-happening" life. A majority of my friends will vouch for the fact that when it comes to double meaning, i beat most people hands down(hee hee).
Its interesting, it keeps me happy to come up with such "duality principles", and it spices up my day (and also the days of innumerable people i come across, you are all welcome by the way :D!).
Another example, I've seen a number of girls wearing t-shirts with "Double Bubble" written across the torso. If any of you ever wore such a disaster and saw me pointing and laughing, you were asking for it.
So many times people around me will roll their eyes and say "Chi Tanvi dirty mind!!". Most of the time they have the same thought in their minds but aren't brave enough to voice it like I am! Instead they point at me and behave as if they are the purest of pure saints to ever walk on this planet.
I remember when i was an innocent little convent school girl, back in 8th Std, I thank God for Maisara, Divya and Anushree who are mostly responsible for my present state :D.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Caution! Vomit ahead!


I remember it clearly as if it happened yesterday. One of the funniest incidents in my life, which is bound to produce a giggle from me each time i relate it. The most memorable New Years Day ever.
My cousins, Raunak(then 13) and Anuja(then 9), who reside in Wales, had come to India for their Christmas break. As is tradition, I always unfailingly take them to Ovenfresh, Shivaji Park to have pastries every time they are here, sometimes even twice. The "Incident" happened during one such trip two years ago, on January 1st, 2007. Anuja, though she was suffering from a bout of indigestion, nagged me till i relented and took her there along with Raunak. My friend Amogh decided to accompany us too.
After gorging on quite a few pastries, Anuja started squirming uneasily and said that she felt sick and a bit throw-uppy. So, we excused ourselves and I took her to the toilet(It was a unisex dingy one not lacking at all in the stink department), which was in a corridor in between the kitchen and the seating area. As we were about to enter, Anuja could contain it no longer and the pastries were back, only this time on the floor and in a semi-digested liquidy form popularly known as vomit. We jumped over it and entered the loo, where Anuja cleaned herself up. Getting out, we dodged the vomit again and were just about to leave the corridor when a heavy-set man in shorts pushed past us on his way to relieve himself. Either he wasn't paying attention or he wasn't paying attention (has to be at least), but he slipped on the vomit and slid a little in it and fell smack down in the middle of the puddle.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anuja and I were speechless with horror and uncontrollable laughter, that we were trying to fight back. We ran out of the corridor and then rushed to our table, tears of mirth streaking down our faces. It was the hardest i had ever laughed in my life. Through hysterics, we related the disaster to Amogh and Raunak who stared at us with their mouths hanging open and then burst out laughing themselves. To add to everything else, the poor guy who had just had the most humiliating incident happen to him with us as audience(though he did not know this), had been sitting at the table next to us and returned to his seat after having washed himself thoroughly(this was clearly visible from his soaked shirt and shorts). Even the waiters were smirking at him. We quickly paid the bill and cleared the hell out of there.
To this day I feel sorry for that unlucky sod and sincerely hope that he had his vision checked after that disaster(I swear that the vomit was as clearly visible as a man hole on the side of a street). However, I thank him profusely (whoever and wherever he is) for this memory as it is one of the best i have!
I know, I am mean.
ha ha.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Confessions of a Hippo Pencil Case


My name is Happy. I was born at NICI toy factory along with hundreds of my brothers /sisters (It’s hard to distinguish since we do not have any “thing” to tell us apart). Along with my brother Hippy, I was kept on display at Cute Point Stores. We would have an amazing time, smiling at the customers, glad that nobody bought us for a long time.

Then one day I was picked out by a cruel sadistic boy Sanket for his friend Tanvi (I thought I was meant for 8 year olds, though in a way I do feel I am owned by one!). She checked to see if my zipper was working (I felt violated) and bought me right away. After all, I am rather cute, even if I do say so myself. I was maliciously named “Hiphopper” and it makes me nauseous to even be remotely related to that slimy git called Daku Daddy. To this day, I am suffering from a severe identity crisis.

If you feel that the initial stages of my life were painful, the days that followed were excruciating. Probably the worst thing that happened to me was when Tanvi was transferred to C1. I came across a selection of vindictive teenagers. One of them, Vishal Keswani, whom I like to refer to as Wicked Vishal, would use me to clean table tops! My luscious fake grey fur turned greyer and I got a severe allergy from the dust, but do you think anyone actually noticed?

Another terror is Tishya Kaul. She derives pleasure by making me lie flat on my back (wonder what pleasure she gets out of it!), though I have nothing to hide (and nothing to show). If it weren’t for Ambreen Kazi, who immediately turns me over, I would have completely lost all respect for myself. She is an angel. I have the most humongous crush on her. If I could have one wish, I would want her to turn into a pencil case shaped like a hippo too (though would prefer her to be of the opposite sex, for even though I am not sure about mine I am certain that I am not homosexual). She is the light of my life, my reason to be alive.

I am extremely jealous of Gaurav Komera (since he seems to have a special bond with Ambreen). I am sure he is totally aware of my animosity. He freely molests me in front of a bunch of spectators. I feel like a puppet in his cruel hands. He makes me dance around as if I am his personal slave. The only thing that keeps me going is that this makes my Ambreen laugh. Oh how sweet is the sound of thy tinkling laughter, my fair Ambreen!

The other day, I had a brief reunion with my brother/sister, Hippy. A guy called Himanshu Masand asked Tanvi to get him a similar hippo case to the one she owns (me). I really hope he was gifting Hippy to some girl or else it would be extremely pansy of him to own one himself. I hope Hippy has a luckier and happier life outside the shop than I do.

There you go. I have spilt my heart out to you. The days I have seen, the things I have been through, I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy (Tishya, Gaurav, hmmmm). The only thing I want in return is to forever be near my darling Ambreen, and may she always fondle me till my last breath!

Monday, March 9, 2009

BUS-TED


(my favourite entry from my previous blog)

I have been traveling by bus for the past 8 years.. First just a short distance along Hill Road from my school, when I lived in Bandra, and then up to Mahim, after I moved. Finally from R.D. National College and later Thadomal Shahani Engineering College on Linking road to Mahim.

What annoys me greatly is that as change the conductors return 25 paise coins, which are not accepted anywhere else and just lie in the corner of my wallet or bag for ages without being used in any kind of transactions.

Just last year the B.E.S.T introduced the concept of smart cards with a limited validity, depending on the route, instead of buying tickets (Finally!!) They save the hassle of buying and storing millions of tickets as well as loose change. As time passed, some of the conductors have become too lazy to get out their infra-red card checkers each time someone produces a card. This irritates me to no ends as I make the effort to dig into all corners of my bag for the card and all the conductor does is wave his hand at me in a disinterested manner and move ahead to the next passenger. Typically, this habit of theirs failed when I need it the most! The validity on my card had expired and since college was on for just a few more days, I didn’t think it necessary to extend the validity. As I was relying on the ignorant attitude of the conductor to save me from finding some loose change for the t, I showed him my card and tried to appear nonchalant. And as luck would have it, he pulled out his checking contraption, scrutinized the card and said “Memsaab ye khatam ho Gaya hai!” I acted all surprised and apologetic as if it was a genuine mistake on my part and produced the fare, while all the time in my mind I was going “Damn Damn Damn Damn!!!!”

Many people prefer trains to buses, but I beg to differ. I love travelling by buses, irrespective of what i have written above.

I would never trade, unless I get my own car!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEE--MAY--GE


Many would agree with me that "It's what is on the inside that matters"*snigger snigger* is a load of crap. Physical appearances DO matter. For example, when you are new to a class, you look around, automatically size up people and see with whom you would fit in most apprpriately. You won't stop and think about whether the bespectacled salwar kameez clad girls with sticky hair oil are actually cooler than then low waist denims donning, made-up ones. Its just the way they appear that makes the decision.
If you think people make wrong assessments of your personality, maybe its not so much their shallowness than you not making an effort to make them take you seriously. If the way you carry yourself, the way you dress, is louder than you are about yourself, not to mention antithetical, then it is not surprising if you make a wrong impression.
The world today is very superficial. Most do not care about how a person's nature is. Its the way they look that matters.
"Don't judge a book by it's cover." Ha Ha. It is "better said than done."

Sunday, March 8, 2009

My new Backpack!



Ooooo i love it! It's just perfect! And so many nooks and compartments! Just can't decide where i want to keep what! People who are close to me know i name things i love. For example, my iPod Touch is called TinTin and my 4 GB pen drive is called Chip. My previous iPod Nano was called Neo.
Soooo I'm going to name this bag Topaz.
FYI (For Your Information for those who are not familiar with popular slang acronyms) topaz is available in a variety of colours, including blue (see above image).

/*IMAGES courtesy of
Greatland Backpack: www.target.com
Blue Topaz: www.oneilsgems.com
*/